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Monday, April 5, 2010

How Did I Become An Army Wife?

I met my husband when we were in college. He was going to be a priest and I was going to be a nurse. Friendship became love and sooner rather than later we ended up pregnant with our first son. He was in his third year with the ROTC and his fourth in the Physics department when he took the decision to leave the ROTC and get his bachelor degree before he had planned it so he could support his new family. My family in the other hand didn’t believe in us and didn’t like him at all. We married a week before my due date and he left a day before our son turned two months old for his BT. We didn’t live together during all this time because my parents didn’t want us to and I thought they actually had the power to keep me away from him. They helped a lot though, but we paid them back by been apart from each other more than we should of have.

Once he came from AIT (they didn’t let me go see him during his graduation) we begun our life as a family of three. He was a reservist and tried to find a job as a physicist with no luck so two years after that he joined the AGR program. We were just in time to properly welcome our second and last child, our daughter. We then decided two children were more than enough and started planning for their future.

So, I guess I didn’t become an Army Wife at any particular point but rather became a Wife/Army Wife all at the same time. I don’t know other way to professionally support my husband than to cheer him up in his military career. I didn’t want him to join the Reserves when I got pregnant but he had always loved the Army so it was all part of the package (pun intended). There are days where I hate this life, especially because of the long absences and the fact that we are just mistresses and the Army is the wife but that also has its own advantages! I don’t like to be scared of pending deployments or certain missions but I like the thrill of the adventure of not knowing where we go next, the challenges with each duty station or the romance behind each phone call and letter/e-mail. There are friends who do not like my involvement in the Army or the federal government (PR is a territory divided into those who fight for its independence of the U.S. and those who would like to see it as the 51st state) but I don’t get those friend’s points of view so we are even I believe. To some people in the island he’s a Hero and to others he just sells his Land every day but we love and believe in the same things and that’s what matters and what at the end makes us stronger as a couple and as a family.

More than an Army wife…yes of course I’m more than that! But this kind of life defines who I am, it really does. I’m a nurse, medical interpreter/translator, and soon health educator because those are careers I can carry with me everywhere…and I care about where I can go because of the Army. We have two children because I feel that’s a perfect number to keep safe in a busy airport in a foreign country since I have a hand for each…and that also worries me because of the Army. I have two dogs even though I love animals because that’s usually the amount of animals allowed on a post per household. I have four cockatiels and all but one (my favorite) have plan Bs for when we PCS next. My internet connection fits in my pocket because when you PCS that’s where you sometimes need it. I don’t buy expensive furniture if I know it’s too fragile to move it across the ocean. Although we speak Spanish as our 1st language we taught our children English as their 1st because that makes more sense with a military life. I don’t put up stuff on the walls because I know one of us will get stuck removing and covering the holes when we PCS. I don’t even look at pretty curtains because they have to be practical and cheap so it doesn’t hurt when we move to a house with different size windows. I live in a tropical island and keep five boxes with Winter clothing for all the family in case we need to move to Alaska (I’d love that).

Thing is, I love my life. It might not fit some people’s standards but heck, not many get to marry their prince in shining armor and live happily ever after….going from adventure to adventure and from castles, to countries, to oceans, to islands, …..




Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Tattoos

I read in another blog about tattoos and decided to share the story of our tattoos here. Hubby and I like everything gothic and with a meaning and although tattoos had always amazed me I never got one because my parents would not let me. I was a very obedient child as you see :-p By our 5th anniversary, hubby and I realized our bodies only belong to each other so...after driving around what's known as El Condado in Puerto Rico (tourist area) we decided to get our tattoos done in a small tattoo parlor. It ended up been the tattoo parlor of a very famous guy here in the island and his work is always admired by those who know about body art.


D and I have the same tattoo but his is bigger and has my name on it, while mine is smaller and has his name on it. It has the Sun, the Earth, and a star, looked from the outer space from the Capricornus constellation which is of the month we met (September). D’s skin is dark and the colors of his tattoo are very bright and have not faded in 7 years. I can also say the same about mine but my skin is fair so it’s not that uncommon anyways. We have tried to track down the tattoo artist so we can have another one done with no luck. With our next tattoo we want to honor our children and won’t necessary get the same one. I have thought of having my son draw a dragonfly and my daughter a butterfly and then have their drawings tattooed on my ankle.

What you think about tattoos? Do you have any?


Friday, March 26, 2010

Blog Safety

I’ve been reading about blog safety and the things people do post and don’t. I’ve always followed OPSEC but don’t think I’ve done a good job at keeping our civilian location private. We are stationed overseas and the first language in the island is Spanish so that might be the reason I feel ok about posting this info on here. I have removed my children’s pictures from this site which sucks because I like sharing their pictures (what mother doesn’t) but after reading what other bloggers think I’ll take preventive measures. D doesn’t like me to post anything on internet but I can’t help it, this is who I am and he respects my wishes as long as I don’t put our family in danger.


I feel it’s not fair since most of you share these things with me…What are your opinions on this?








Monday, March 22, 2010

Tofu and Lent Season

I don’t like to cook especially because it can get boring sometimes. This is Lent season and my husband was going to be a priest before we met, so I always have to become more than creative during these 40 days out of respect for his beliefs. I’m catholic but he practices our faith more than I do. Last year I fixed seafood almost every day and although it is good for a man to eat sea food <> I hate how my kitchen smells during and after the food is done. I decided to try Asian food this week and of course I had to try and make tofu. I’ve heard tofu can be really hard to make and can turn into a mushy thing that looks more like baby food, but after some research on internet and the tips of a facebook friend (who’s vegan) I realized tofu is super easy to make, is healthy, and yummy! Which is important for my children :0)



I bought the extra firm tofu at the commissary which was around $1.50 . There's another brand more expensive like $1.99 but I tried the cheap one in case it ended up in the trash.


I drained the tofu block for 15-20 minutes using paper towels and a heavy dish on top of it, cut it in half, and then each half in thirds, and those thirds in thirds, and those thirds in triangles. Then "fried" it without any oil, so the water that was left inside could evaporate. My friend adviced me to use bread crumbs so it wouldn't stick to the pan but since I didn't have any at home and couldn't go to the commy (car is broken) I went ahead and used rice wheat. It helped a lot because it didn't stick at all and gave it a crunchy texture on the outside.


In about 10-15 minutes they looked like this!


After I was done with the tofu, added canola spray to the pan and stir fried Asian vegerables (including bamboo shoots) in soy sauce, pepper & garlic, and recaito (Puerto Rican mix of herbs in virgin oil). Then I added the tofu and pour a bit more of soy sauce so it could absorb the sauce flavor too.


This is the end result! I served with rice noodles and the kids and D loved it, they even went for seconds and asked me to make the same dish for Good Friday. I can't wait to try more tofu recipes, the next one I think will be lemon & rosemary baked tofu :0) My daughter already asked me to make egg rolls using tofu! Their Asian genes are kicking in!!!

Saturday, March 20, 2010

The Ultimate Price

Haven't been around much because I'm working on my last class assignments for this session. I think I will get A on Epidemiology and am still working on Cross-Cultural class but it's looking good.

Yesterday I learned on twitter that a Marine wife had lost her husband who was deployed in Afghanistan. This is any Military wife's nightmare and I'm so sorry that she has to go through this. She's only 23 years old and has a baby girl that will never meet her dad in person. Life seems so unfair sometimes. They are in my prayers and I wish life pays her back for taking her soulmate too soon, and for all the memories that will never be. There's a song that I love and always makes me think on my husband and all the things our Armed forces go through every day...including those of us who are left behind. Sometimes I hate the Army for having priority over us, but I'm proud to have married a man that is willing to die for what he believes in. I'm sure A Little Pink In A World Of Camo is proud that her husband dared to live his dream. He dared to live with a purpose. God bless this Hero and his family. We do not die, we just change our address.

~Hand Of Sorrow~
Within Temptation

The child without a name grew up to be the hand


To watch you, to shield you, or kill on demand

The choice he'd made he could not comprehend

His blood a grim secret they had to commend



He's torn between his honor and the true love of his life

He prayed for both but was denied



So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind

So many years have passed, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?



The curse of his powers tormented his life

Obeying the crown was a sinister crime

His soul was tortured by love and by pain

He surely would flee, but the oath made him stay



He's torn between his honor and the true love of his life

He prayed for both but was denied



So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind

So many years have passed, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?



Please forgive me for the sorrow

For leaving you in fear

For the dreams we had to silence

That's all they'll ever be

Still I'll be the hand that serves you

Though you'll not see that it is me



So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind

So many years have past, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?





Sunday, March 14, 2010

Passion Party & Racism All in the Same Weekend!

Hubby’s doing drill this weekend so I had to play single mom for the last two days. Yesterday we went to Yauco (my parent’s town) and my father babysat for me while mom and I went to my cousin’s for a Passion Party!! This is the second time I go to one of these parties. The first time was at a friend’s and all my ESL students went too so we had a blast. I talked to my cousin and the consultant and that’s how this last party happened. I ordered few things and I must say it is SO fun for couples to share these things together. If you have not gone to this kind of party before you should. It is not like you learn secret things or anything, but you have fun exploring the possibilities and in my case learning that although being spontaneous is good, planning ahead can also be FUN!


Today I’ve been in my house chilling but since my kiddos were bored I decided to go to the park and take the dogs with us. The park is around the block so it’s not a huge walk after all. We had fun until…a Caucasian family arrived in the park and decided to make their children go to the opposite playground my children were playing on. This happened four or five times ‘til I decided they were been obvious and didn’t care. Their children wanted to play with mine but they didn’t let them and mind you, everybody talks about how well behaved my kids are so it’s not like they are brats. My daughter was even elected student of the week this past week and my son is in his school's honor roll. They are not delincuents of anything :)


Long ago this kind of situation would have sent me in a frenzy and I would have said a couple of things to them but as I have grown and matured I have changed some of my ways. I wasn't aware of racism until the Army sent us to this Army unfriendly town where everyone knew each other and Latin or Hispanic people were considered a cancer. We had to move out of there under hardship orders after the Army decided (after a bunch of incidents) that our lifes were in danger. This time I decided to ignore this family and explain my children that some people didn’t like to be associated with other races because they were afraid others could expose their limitations (i.e. language) to the public. I also told them that they should not get mad and much less sad because God is always watching and He knew if racism was really in their hearts, and what to do in such case. I said we can’t judge them because I would be doing the same thing they were doing and so on… The thing is, I feel so much better now!


I think about this in this way; if they feel superior they are not, so that’s enough punishment. If they are afraid of us for being multilingual, then that’s enough punishment. If they feel we are unfairly taking their jobs, they are wrong because we are American born citizens and they are right, we are taking their jobs because we have a better education and to top it all we speak three languages, so that’s enough punishment. If they believe their children are better, they are wrong because mine are (sarcasm), so that’s enough punishment. If they don’t mind showing off their racism, they will live a very hard life in a diverse country like U.S., so that’s enough punishment. If they teach their children to be racist, they are limiting their own children, so that’s enough punishment. If they really feel in their hearts they way some Caucasian minorities tell them to act, they are slaves of their own beliefs and will rotten in Hell so, that’s enough punishment.


There’s nothing I can do to change their minds or hearts but to keep annoying them by living my happy life and being the best I can be. The U.S. Military Forces are very diverse and they looked like a really young family so there, they signed up for this. Either time or experience will help them mature and maybe someday they’ll look back on this Sunday evening and will realize how wrong they were and how mean they must have been to mess with children and to corrupt their own children’s hearts. Karma is a b!tch and her daughter looked like she liked my son so they better be careful and keep their children away from the World because they might end up cradling brown babies! LMAO


And last but no least; my beautiful Caucasian friend, Sarah, needs prayers and all the help she can get. Her daughter, Faith, has been diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor and she's only 6 years old. You can read more about her at http://caringbridge.org/visit/faithpruden and http://www.helpfaith.com/

Also if you are a Military Wife I found this lady on facebook, Ashley Inglet from Ashley's SemperFi Creations ,that makes customized wreaths and other items for military families. You may want to take a look.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Hubby made the Direct Commission board!! But haters are already letting us know how they feel...

D made the Direct Commission board and we are really happy for him. I had a promise that I wouldn’t update my facebook status until he passed the board and last night I was able to finally update it. Many friends congratulated him and showed their happiness for us, many of these friends were Military families of course but among those who were happy for us, an ex-neighbor stuck up like a sore thumb. She said that not everything that shines is gold…her story is complex but to make it really short: Her hubby was in the Green to Gold program and after he graduated from nursing school, didn’t pass the NCLEX the two times he tried.


He’s really smart but the problem is that he has to be Mr. Mom, even when he’s studying for something like the NCLEX! He had to take the kids to school and daycare (although his wife didn’t work), pick them up, cook, study with them, clean the house, walk the dogs, and attend to an adult with issues. All this on top of having to study and do good in his job + his classes. Because of this he had to hold back his plans and remain a SSG until he can re-submit his packet as a soldier holding a bachelor and not as an RN. She once told me that once she became an Army Officer wife she wasn’t going to be able to talk to me anymore (she didn’t know dh had submitted his Direct Commission packet then nor she understood the confraternization rules apply to those holding the rank) and usually compared material stuff I have with hers.

Anyways, we knew how she rolls all along it’s just surprising how she can’t even pretend to be happy for us. It is better though, because I don’t like hypocrites but it is still shocking to see how much she can hate us for something that has nothing to do with her particular case.

But as Carla and her husband say: “Ping, ping…that’s the sound of your hate bouncing off our love” or something like that! LOL



In more important notes, please if you read this take a bit more of your time and visit www.caringbridge.org/visit/faithpruden  and http://www.helpfaith.com/  Faith is my friend’s daughter and she was diagnosed with glioma (terminal brain tumor) she’s only 6 years old and the doctors have given her only 6 months to live. Please read more about her and if you can, donate something to her family, even if it’s prayer. They need a miracle.